I know how you feel right now and I want to help you and everyone else that suffers from Fibromyalgia and Chronic Fatigue.
I am doing fine these days. I became a Grandmother on October 31, 2007. I thought I would never be able to hold my Grandchildren because of my fatigue and pain. I believe my faith and prayers made a difference and made it possible for me to find the strength I needed to stay positive, try new products, medications to help me feel better. This is why I started my mission to help others too.
Yes, I noticed you have not been on any forums or boards. In fact, I felt you pulling away from me. I know it is hard to trust someone over the Internet. Especially since you experienced such negative responses and attitudes from your own friends and co-workers.
People do not want to hear or be around sick people. They only want to experience good things. Well, the only way I can feel good about myself is to reach out to someone like you, my friend. It is hard to accept help or even ask for help. I was fortunate enough to have good friends, co-workers and family members willing to reach out and try to help. I know not everyone is that fortunate.
I am sorry to hear you are experiencing a deep depression. These are your words:
Right now I am in a deep depression. I have prayed and prayed for God to take me. But here I am.
Do you ever get really depressed? I just lay in bed and cry. I hate it. Is it part of fibro?
When an individual is experiencing extreme pain and fatigue it is normal to feel depressed. Seek medical help and don’t let anyone blame you for feeling blue. I still remember the morning I woke up and suddenly I felt extreme pain, fatigue and everything else that goes with this disorder. I was fighting it and struggling to find out what was going on. I continued working and I deceived myself, believing that it was just the flu, my gall bladder, anything the doctor tried to rule out. I just knew things would get better. The truth of the matter is I hit rock bottom and felt useless, worthless, stupid, and much more. Do you remember the poem I wrote? It expressed how I felt. I will post again. The depression is caused by the fatigue and pain you are experiencing.
I’m hurting so badly. The medicine I take only at night and do not take during day or I’d get nothing done. But it makes me bolder, I find myself saying and doing things that I would never have nerve and be brave enough to do. Is that normal with meds?
Talk to your doctor about the medications you are taking. Everyone reacts differently to medications. What types of things are you doing and saying? How do you feel when you say something you normally would not have said before? I suggest you write down how you feel and think about what might have caused those reactions you are talking about. It will help you sort out those thoughts and emotions.
When I talk to a doctor or individual that does not believe in fibromyalgia or chronic fatigue, I feel sad and alone. I have to take back control of my emotions and just forget about them. I know what I feel everyday of my life. They are not experiencing my pain and fatigue, yet they make judgments and mean remarks. The way I deal with this is to just pray and ask God to give me the strength to forget about them. God knows what we are feeling. Don’t let them hurt you.
I’m sorry to ask all these questions. I just feel lost. I wish I’d die right now. Its not just the pain its everything. I feel like I am holding on to a thread. The least thing upsets me and makes me feel like I’m having a nervous breakdown. Do you ever feel like that?
My friend, never feel badly about asking questions. I am here for you and anyone else that seeks encouragement and help. I too felt lost and wanted to give up. I have cried myself to sleep because of my pain and fatigue. I did not want to complain to my family and friends. I found that crying, praying and resting helped me. However, you need additional support and help. Talk to your doctor, you may need to change your depression medication. In the beginning I had to try several different types of medications to help me deal with the pain and fatigue. I also suffer from panic/anxiety attacks. I have to take medication for those attacks. They are hard to deal with, you feel closed in, lost and unable to breathe. Do not try to handle these emotions on your own. Seek medical help and try to join a support group.
You have to seek help, be open to expressing your feelings, write them down, keep a journal and please try Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. Positive self-talk helps me out tremendously. I promise.
I better go. Take care. I hope everything is well with you and your family.
I am worried about you and want you to call me. I know you find it hard to trust, please let me help you. Thank you for asking about my family. They are hanging in there. Please remember you are not alone.
The only reason I am answering you on my site is because I know you are not the only person feeling this way. Just know you are helping others too. I know you have a big heart and want to help people too. Together we can help each other and spread the word about this horrific disorder.
Love your friend,
Viviana
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