Coping through Acceptance and a Positive Attitude

Hello Everyone,

I have learned to cope through acceptance and a positive attitude. We all know the fatigue of FM is much more than being tired. It is an all-encompassing exhaustion that interferes with even the simplest daily activities. It feels like every drop of energy has been drained from the body, which at times is accompanied with pain leaving you with a limited ability to function both mentally and physically.

Our attitude about life and our situation and our illness definitely shapes our perception and the way we experience things on a day-to-day basis. The way we deal and think about the pain, fatigue, physical deterioration, emotional lows, crises, grief and other challenges has a tremendous impact on our health.

Through meditation you can learn to relax and become more aware of your thoughts and feelings. As you become more in tune with your body and mind, you start to set appropriate limits on your physical activities and make healthy eating choices. Focus on something positive each day and remind yourself of the things you are able to accomplish.

Share your experiences with others, be positive about yourself, eat healthy, sleep, move, take your medications and consider alternative therapies.

Together we can figure out how to effectively fight back and survive the daily challenges of living with any health challenge.

I hope and pray everyone has a pain and fatigue free day.

Feeling Stronger Everyday

Hello Everyone!

How are you feeling today? These days I am feeling like I have the necessary emotional qualities to deal with stress, risk, and other physical and emotional difficulties. Spending time with family and friends leads to feeling tolerant of my fatigue and pain. One of the many ways of dealing with an illness is to get lost in the fantasy of our hopes and dreams by taking risks, allowing yourself to remain flexible and open to new adventures, and finding balance in your life.

Do yourself a favor and try something new, do something different, go out and have some fun. Allow yourself time to enjoy life and the people around you. The people in our lives are blessings God has given us. Spend some quality time with your family and friends. Time away from the reality of our daily tasks, chores, and responsibilities initiates a release of mental and physical tension and stress. Allow yourself to be freed from prejudice and receptive to new ideas. There are many ways of dealing with stress and daily responsibilities. Every now and then, we deserve a break. Take one today!

I hope and pray you had a pain and fatigue free day!

Stress Management Basics and Tips

Hello Everyone,

I hope I am not repeating myself on various topics. I am all about enriching our lives and finding ways to recognize, cope, promote, and encourage strategies for remaining resilient amidst the relentless demands of life, work, unending personal responsibilities and unexpected setbacks. If stress seems to be causing such problems for you, it's a good idea to learn how to reduce these symptoms before they get worse.

Stress is a normal part of life that we can't escape and we are all well acquainted with stress. Maybe you are late for an appointment, pushing to meet a deadline, putting off reading the mail or pile of bills, or stuck in the wrong line at the bank or grocery store, it will all work out.

Sometimes we encounter a greater degree of stress, when we have to cope with emotionally fraught events like divorce, the loss of a job, chronic illness, or the death of someone dear to us. Believe it or not stress accompanies even the happiest occasions in life, like getting married or having a baby.

We experience stress as physical and emotional tension, and each of us experiences stress differently. Too much tension can be unhealthy, resulting in everything from occasional tension headaches to high blood pressure and heart disease. These symptoms are the body's way of letting us know that something needs to change.

Of course, it's impossible to eliminate stress from our lives completely. But we can find better ways to deal with it. These techniques can help minimize stress and make it more manageable:

* Planning for major changes ( I know our body and mind don't always cooperate)
* Eliminating wasted time
* Setting attainable short- and long-term goals
* Allowing yourself time to adapt to change
* Making good nutrition and regular exercise part of your daily routine

People with chronic illnesses have to find ways to deal with unexpected changes and new demands. I know that planning doesn't always work because our mind and body doesn't always want to cooperate! Therefore, it is a good idea to have some sort of release strategies that work for you. I believe in repeating a phrase or quote to assist me with relaxing. A hot bath is very soothing, listening to music, reading, or taking advantage of quiet time can make a big difference. Just know that you are in control of your emotions and can work at reducing the physical and emotional effects of stress in your life.


Mental Strategies: Start with getting your emotions under control. Start thinking about ways to avoid stressful situations. Try to find a good time to shop or bank, during odd hours and not on a payday! What a mistake. I went to the grocery store on the 15th, bad idea. If you need assistance completing your tasks, don't be afraid to ask. Gratitude, admiration, and generously go a long way. Be honest and express your appreciation, there are many ways to reciprocate.

Try writing everything down. I am a big advocate of writing things down. I know it takes a bit of energy and time however, the end result is great. My memory isn't what it used to be, so what? I am still enjoying life. Stimulate your brain and broaden your horizons by investing time on hobbies and even continued education. I know that sounds crazy, but taking a class in something that interest you will keep you mentally charged. Keeping a good sense of humor is a great stress reliever.

Physical Strategies: Wear comfortable clothes and shoes. I have had to switch to very light weight clothes, shoes, purses. I have even changed the pots and pans I use. Meditate, try simple yoga moves, gentle stretches, and posture scans. Move, don't sit or stand for long periods of time. Rotate your head, shoulders, arms, and legs. Just be silly and wiggle around. It releases tensions, circulates the blood and ultimately improves your health.

Drink plenty of water, increase your intake of fruit, vegetables, and grains.

Did you know that physical contact with the people you care about helps to relieve stress? Soft hugs, pats on the shoulder, and if your lucky enough a massage goes a long way. A good diet, movement, and personal contact are simple ways to handle your stress.

Planning simplifies my life, making short and long-term realistic goals and forgiving myself for missing a planned task, chore, or event relieves my stress. Don't overdo, keep it simple.

The first step in dealing with stress is acceptance. Keeping a sense of humor, adapting to change, learning how to cope, and focusing on the positive promotes our overall health and well-being.

I hope and pray you have a fatigue and pain free day and continue to focus on the positive aspects of your life.

Advice & Tips on Dealing with Anxiety

Hello Everyone!

I just wanted to share a few tips on dealing with anxiety. People deal with all types of anxiety, some people do not want to admit they suffer from anxiety. Personally, I believe it relieves stress when you are able to accept and deal with any anxiety issues you may be experiencing.

Whether anxiety rarely rears its ugly head in your life or is a frequent, unwelcome visitor, you can benefit from the following suggestions for overcoming or relieving stress, anxiety and worry. Choose the strategies you think will work for you, and give them a shot! Remember, there is no one "cure" for anxiety, but the more coping skills you have, the better you will be able to eliminate its impact on your life.


Special Note from Fibro Viv:
Of course, these cannot replace the help of a qualified therapist - if you feel you are unable to deal with your anxiety on your own, take that important step and give one a call.


With Yourself


* Get to the real root of your feelings. If you feel extremely anxious about work, for example, chances are thin that your stress will simply disappear on its own. You may have to dig deep to find what is bothering you - could it be a fear of failure, unhappiness in your current position, or too much pressure? Once you find the cause of the problem, you can take constructive steps to alleviate it.

* Practice positive self-talk. Anxiety is often a vicious circle and eliminating (or at least cutting down) the negative thoughts that start the chain is sometimes enough to get you out of the trap.

* Keep things in perspective. Think back to other times that you felt this anxious - did they always warrant such a strong reaction? This is not to beat yourself up about the past, but to realize that you have and can again survive situations that you thought were too much too handle.

* Reminder: Worrying does not change anything. Only constructive action can bring about results. And there are some things we just can't control. Remember the old mantra, "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I can not change, courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference"? Whether you believe in an almighty maker or not, this little prayer carries a powerful message and a worthy goal.

* Be in tune with yourself. Know when you are beginning to feel anxious and have strategies to avoid a full-blown attack.

* Evaluate your self-confidence. Anxiety can often stem from feelings of inadequacy. If you discover you could boost your self-esteem, take active steps to do so - there are some great books on the subject.

* Forgive yourself. Anxious does not equal weak. Everyone gets stressed, and it's not your fault if you can't handle it sometimes. It is, however, your responsibility to take steps to change. Believe that things CAN get better. Because they can!

* Take small steps. If, for example, you are anxious at the mere thought of speaking in front of a group and you have to do a presentation, try practicing first in front of the mirror, then with one friend/family member, and work your way up to a larger group of friends. During the entire process, visualize yourself doing it in front of a larger group. Build your way up.Sometimes just being around a big crowd of people can be overwhelming for people that suffer from chronic illnesses. You can and will be able to improve any personal bubble you might be experiencing.

* Talk to a professional. Don't be afraid to seek help from a medical doctor or a therapist (look in your local phone book for a list of therapists in your area who may help you).

* Talk to a loved one, a close friend, and share your experience. You will find you are not alone!

* Educate yourself.


When you are with Others

* Get it out. Talk to friends, family or someone you know is a good listener. If you aren't close enough to anyone, consider joining a support group or even a hobby club to meet like-minded people.

* Give someone the squeeze. Physical affection and touch are great stress-relievers. If you don't have a partner, friend or family member that you feel comfortable touching, even a pet can do the trick.

* Learn to put your foot down. Sometimes you just have to say no, for your own sake. It may surprise people at first, but being pulled in a million directions is a major contributor to stress.

* Ask for help. That may mean asking your kids to help in the house, or a friend to support you in stressful situations.



Day-to-Day Habits

* Keep a journal. Use it to vent your feelings, but don't leave it at that - write the positive side of every experience (even if the only thing you can find is "developing inner strength"), and brainstorm ways you can work towards eliminating some of the stresses you feel.

* Shake that body! Exercise is a great stress reliever, whether it's smashing a tennis ball, bowling or doing stretching exercises at home. The body and mind are strongly connected, and neglecting either will have negative consequences. You may want to take up yoga or meditation. Listen to music, it is uplifting!

* Eat your veggies. Take a look at your diet - are you getting all the essential minerals and vitamins? Make sure you keep your blood sugar level stable and cut down on nasty habits (smoking, over-eating); you may think that they are comforting you and helping you deal with stress, but it's actually the opposite.

* Let go and laugh. When you feel stress building, seek out the things that make you laugh - a funny movie, a joke, a favorite website, a goofy friend.

* Pamper yourself - you're worth it. Make a list of things that relax you and make you feel good - a bubble bath, a movie, a magazine, playing a game, going for a walk, a certain CD, comfy clothes, watching a certain sport. Keep the list handy for the next time you feel the stress building. Don't use these activities to avoid difficult situations, but they may calm you enough to be able to handle them better.

* Connect with nature. Whether it's taking a stroll in the park and looking at the trees or going on a weekend hike in the mountains, getting out in the great outdoors can be calming and strengthening at the same time.

* Avoid anxiety triggers. If there are unhealthy people or places in your life, consider decreasing their role. If however, you are anxious about situations that are not damaging and are in fact useful/necessary (ie. talking to your boss about a new idea, or traveling in a car), you should form a solid plan to deal with these feelings.

* Create comfort zones/times. To avoid stress from building up, have scheduled times for you to unwind (before bed is a good time, so your mind is at rest and you can get a good night's sleep). The comforting activity should be something you enjoy; something you know will make you feel good. The comfort zone is a place where you can escape and unwind - it could be a corner of your living room or a spot in the park.


I hope and pray everyone has a fatigue and pain free day. God Bless

What is a healthy healing in refection?

Hello Everyone,

Today I found an interesting question on one of my community sites. Here is what was asked: In your opinion or basing from your experiences, what is healthy healing in reflection? I found myself thinking about the question and decided to share my answer on my site as well as on blogcatalog.com.


In my point of view, the following technique is a good way to reflect in a healthy way:


- an individual must first decide to choose a specific time to reflect,
- be specific about what you want to focus on,
- think about one challenge (issue) at a time,
- determine what you want and decide if it is realistic,
- be open and non-judgmental,
- realize the answer to your questions or issues may require sharing your feelings with another individual,
- if you have a difficult time expressing your feelings with another individual, write them down on paper,
- if you shared your feelings with someone, reaffirm your respect for their opinion and end on a positive tone.

This technique or strategies enables an individual to establish an atmosphere of cooperative problem-solving and/or reflection.

I hope and pray this post has helped someone today.

Fibro Viv

The Consequence of Chronic Stress

Hello Everyone,

I feel the need to take the time to post something today because I believe it is very important to keep this information on hand and remind yourself at least twice a month. Place it where you know you will see it and remind yourself about the consequence of chronic stress.

The Consequence of Chronic Stress

Chronic stress weakens our immune system and increases the risk of coming down with a range of illnesses. This could be heart disease, high blood pressure, depression, among other illnesses. If you are already dealing with a chronic illness, you must try not to stress out. I know it is easier said than done, based on my own experience. Stress can be toxic, if you let it take over.

What can stress drive people to do? A person can eat too much or too little, sleep too much or too little, stop exercise or stretching routines, and can also cause an individual to not have any fun in their lives.

Some stress is necessary to survive because just a little stress can help an individual get focused, improve memory and heighten their emotions. Stress responses within an individual causes them to swing into action or better yet, react in a way that can help. The key is to find the balance and understand the need, but not to make it toxic.

As I think about my life within the past few months, I have had family illnesses, hospital trips, doctor and pharmacy visits that were necessary and I had stress. I was dealing with trying to keep my family healthy, laundry, housekeeping, cooking and not to mention the cost of all the medical requirements within my own home. Yes, this has caused me to stress.

How have I dealt with it? I accepted what was happening without question, and just tried to complete each task as it came up. If I allowed my emotions to get out of control, my stress could become toxic and my pain would increase. Somehow, God gave me the strength I needed to deal with everything I needed to do.

I could start feeling guilty about not posting on my sites, but then I practiced self-talk and told myself everything would work out. I have come to the conclusion that I cannot be everything to everyone, and be there for everyone. I am in control of my own feelings and thoughts and I must only allow good thoughts to take over my emotions.

I am a daughter, sister, wife, mother, mother-in-law, aunt, grandmother, and friend. However, I know I cannot be there for all of them. I have my limitations and I must understand them and accept them.

I pray this post and my own personal experience has helped someone today.

Fibro Viv

Strategies for Stress Management

Since I just posted how badly I am feeling lately, I decided I better remind myself of these strategies:

Think about identifying circumstances that cause you stress (stressor) and your symptoms of stress. For each stressor, ask yourself two questions:

1). How important is this to me?
2). Can I control this event or situation?

Consider the the control and importance to help you determine which strategies to use. Skills that will help you manage stress include:

Awareness Skills
Acceptance Skills
Coping Skills
Action Skills


AWARENESS SKILLS

* Work on being consciously aware of stressful situations. Review signs and symptoms associated with stress

* Identify common causes of stress for you


ACCEPTANCE SKILLS

* Keep it in perspective, Don't think catastrophically

* Avoid over-dramatizing or exaggerating reactions of others.

* Keep a positive attitude.

* Avoid worrying about things that may never happen.

* Use positive self-talk (Cognitive behavior therapy)

* If worries and fears are causing you stress, ask yourself:

1). Has this happened before?
2). What did I learn from it?
3). What is the worst possible outcome?
4). What else can I do?
5). What advice would I give a friend in this situation?
6). Five years from now...will I remember this event?


COPING SKILLS

1). Non-aerobic stretching exercises like yoga can be calming because they induce deep breathing and a meditation-like mental state. Helps release anxiety, lower blood pressure, and reduces your pain. We need those endorphins released to our brains!

2). Relaxation exercises include a great variety of techniques. One of the easiest to learn is Deep Breathing. Other relaxation techniques include Progressive Muscle Relaxation, Imagery and Mediation.

3). Humor and Laughter: Medical research suggest that humor can have positive effects on both the mental state and the body, particularly in enhancing health and reducing pain.

4). Support from Others: Join a support group or seek support from others in times of stress or need.

ACTION SKILLS

* Practice using clear assertive communication; saying what you need, sometimes we do not know what we need, think about what it is we need.

* Become competent in using time management strategies

Think about this:

--Did I cause it?
--Can I change it?
--Can I control it?

Answer is "NO"
Flow, and do something different
Save energy for something you can impact and change.

PRACTICE SAYING NO
PRACTICE PACING
PLACE BOUNDARIES AROUND WORRIES
IF YOU SPEND SO MUCH TIME ON WORRYING (LIMIT IT)

*********************************************************************
PUTTING IT ALL TOGETHER

Strategies for Managing Stress's

STRESS'S

Controllable and important.....use Change and Action Skills
Uncontrollable and important...use Acceptance and Coping Skills

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Controllable and unimportant....use Action Skills and Acceptance
Uncontrollable and unimportant..use Acceptance and Re framing the Situation.



I pray and hope this has helped someone today. Have a pain and fatigue free day!

Positive Thoughts for Coping

Try writing down these thoughts and read them daily, or print them if you can:

1). Things are getting better.

2). I know I am making progress and I am working on my self-esteem.

3). I am learning to pace and it helps me feel better.

4). Each day I expect to feel more relaxed and I am working on ways to resolve any stress in my life.

5). I am accepting the changes in my life style and can live with them.

6). I know where to look for support and what resources are available to me.

7). Today I plan to focus on ways to help myself continue to heal.

8). I know I can fight this feeling of feeling alone because I am not alone.

9). I am sharing and seeking information on my healing process.

10). I am able to manage my mental and physical fatigue.

Those are just a few things to repeat to yourself. Keep a journal to help you remember good times and ways to feel better. You are alive, so work on making each day a better day. It starts with you accepting change and becoming aware of any negative emotions or thoughts you may be experiencing.

I pray and hope this information helps someone today. Have a great day.



Everything on this site is copyright Viv Walters

Visualize, Dream, Take Care of Yourself

WRITE DOWN YOUR DREAMS AND THOUGHTS AND VISUALIZE YOURSELF SUCCEEDING IN LIFE AND IN GREAT HEALTH.

Remind yourself of your blessings. Think of your happy memories, such as:

The day you were married
Quiet long bath
Pampering yourself
Sharing your faith
Lunch with a friend or family member
Your favorite time in a day or month or in your past

As you do these things, visualize your dreams, meditate and never forget to smile. Remembering your past experiences and how blessed you were to experience them can be very calming and create a smile on your face. Try it.

Try to discuss your hopes and dreams for your life with your partner, family member or friend. Remember to discuss your concerns and do not be afraid to share your thoughts with the people that are close to you. You might even try sharing those thoughts with strangers.

Think of a place and time where you can feel like you are comfortable enough to have these discussions.


THINGS TO DO FOR YOURSELF

1). Think about starting up or joining a class or group that discusses any topics you enjoy. Sharing and expressing is a great experience.

2). Create a list of what is wonderful about where you are, plans, losing your fears, getting older and what you like about yourself. Make an effort to do this daily.

3). Write down where you are at this point in your life and where you want to be, date it three or six months from that date. Place it in your calendar (when you want to open it), you will find that you have accomplished some of those dreams.

4). Write down your dreams and even cut out pictures from a magazine of objects, miscellaneous items and people that look happy. It might help you see what to aim for.

5). Take advantage of keeping a Personal Journal. I have found that I am more appreciative of what I have, what I have accomplished and where I am now. Take it to heart and be proud of yourself.

6). Consider changing your diet to fit your body’s needs...healthy eating and drinking water.

7). Check the different websites or magazines available to you with recommended diets for Fibromyalgia and Chronic Fatigue.


I hope and pray that this post has helped someone today.


Everything on this site copyright Viv Walters

Tips on Staying Cool in a Crisis

I know it is difficult to stay cool during a crisis for some people. Others rise to the challenge and opportunity of a crisis. Here are some tips:

1). Stop and breathe slowly and try to remain calm because I am sure your heart is pounding hard and your pulse is racing fast. So slow those down first.

2). Try to remain focused on the issue at hand, it may be an injured family member, friend or stranger. Or it may be you were just in a car accident and believe you are being stalked......just stay focused and calm.

3). Your inner instincts can help guide you. Trust those instincts.

4). Call 911 if required for medical emergencies, or assistance from the nearest Fire Station, or Police Department. If the problem requires their attention, please let the professionals do their jobs. If you know CPR, then administer it, only if you have attended classes and are able to do it properly.

5). Have important information on you in case of emergencies, so you are properly prepared.

In order to be prepared you must have the following items available at all times:

a. Consider taking a CPR or First Aid Class

b. Keep important medical information about yourself on your person, be it your wallet or billfold.

c. Keep important telephone numbers on your person, be it your wallet or billfold.

d. Make sure you let your emergency notify individuals know you are using them as an emergency contact.

You can prepare for crisis and emergency situations just by following some of these tips. There are probably better tips out on the Internet, so search the net for tips.

You will be able to handle any situation if you feel confident in yourself. You can feel confident by preparing yourself. You can do it!

I hope and pray that this information helps someone today. Have a pain free day.

Fibro Viv

One's Attitude

Ones attitude toward life makes every possible difference in one's living. Life doesn't change so much as you change.

Think about this when times seem hard or you feel you have been treated badly.


I hope and pray this post has helped someone today.

Stressed Out?

When you are stressed out:

- chomp on celery,
- carrots,
- and take a walk,
- try focusing on something else,
- let it go,
and let life take its course.


I pray and hope this post has helped someone today.

Tips for banishing chronic anxiety

The stress of the holidays comes and goes, but ongoing stress -- even at low levels -- can harm health and well-being, experts say.

Here are some tips on how to protect yourself by learning how to manage stress day by day, according to the Mayo Clinic Health Letter:

* Look for signs. Catch stress early by watching for signs such as headache, gut discomfort, tense muscles and fidgety sleep. If you notice these stress alarm signals, it's time to use stress-management techniques.
* Exercise. Even a short walk can improve your mood and reduce stress.
* Eat well. A healthy diet provides your body with the energy to handle daily stress. Making unhealthy food choices and skipping meals can lead to fatigue, greater susceptibility to illness, and a general feeling of poor health.
* Set limits. Refuse some tasks to keep schedules less hectic. This will help you be more productive and successful with the tasks that you do decide to tackle.
* Vent. Friends can provide important social support by listening to your frustrations or providing encouragement.
* Escape. Pleasant distractions such as a good book or movie can help take your mind off your worries.
* Bliss out. Relax with a hobby, exercise, meditation, prayer, slow breathing or anything else that provides you with a feeling of calm.
* Still stressed? Get help. Seeking out help isn't a sign of weakness, it's good judgment.

I hope and pray that this information has helped someone you love today...that might even be you:)

Helpful hints for lowering daily anxieties

Give Stress a Holiday

Hectic lifestyles and anxiety may be an unavoidable fact of modern life, but it's important to manage stress to prevent or reduce stress-related health problems.

Mismanaged stress can result in chronic fatigue, body aches, changes in appetite and increased use of alcohol, drugs or cigarettes, according to experts at the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs (VA).

Here is some information I found that the VA offers on following stress management tips:

* Exercise regularly, even a half-hour every day. Be sure to consult with a doctor before starting any new exercise program, however.
* Sleep well -- between six to 10 hours a night.
* Drink between four to eight glasses of water a day.
* Take time to do something you enjoy.More information

Try to remember that The American Academy of Family Physicians has more about coping with stress.

Good luck....I hope and pray that this information has helped someone today.

Relationships

There are many types of relationships. There are physical and non-physical relationships. There are relationships with friends, family, employers and co-workers. There are even some people that have relationships with their neighbors. I do not have one with my neighbors because I choose not to have one at this time. We all have good and bad relationships.

There are also many styles of relationships. What works best for one person, may not work for another person. The key characteristics which define all successful relationships happen to be respect, encouragement, affirmation, appreciation, forgiveness, shared moments, love, understanding, listening, faithfulness, compromising, endurance and perspective. I am sure there are other characteristics I have missed, however, please remember the main one......respect.

Relationships and respect work both ways. If you want to have friends, you have got be to friendly. If you want to be loved and respected, you must love and respect others. As a person, I strive to be respectable, lovable and always have integrity. I pray that I have displayed this character.

I pray and hope that this post has helped someone today.

Stop Stewing About People's Flaws

I found myself having to remind myself of the title of this post. As many of you know, when we feel pain and fatigue it sometimes is difficult to accept or deal with people that we feel are rude and do not treat us with dignity. Here are some tips that I hope will help you.

STOP STEWING ABOUT PEOPLE'S FLAWS

-If they are insensitive, in order to short-circuit your own tendency to obsess or pick a fight; remember a time when you felt appreciative of something they did. If you met them for the first time and you were treated rudely or without respect, think of someone else that did something special for you or yours. This way your brain will register all those emotions and re-experience them. In a matter of minutes, your anger will fade.

-Take a deep breath, pause and repeat. Say a prayer in their name.
-Stop and ask God to help you deal with this individual or situation that has caused you to feel hurt or angry. He will answer, I promise.

I hope and pray that this post has helped someone today:)